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Never Say these to any woman |
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Do you work for UPS? Because I could swear you were checking out my package."
"The word of the day is legs, so let's go back to my place and spread the word."
"Did you wash those pants in Windex, because I sure can see myself in them."
"My friend was stopped at a stoplight during race week in Daytona Beach. A really cute guy came up to her window, pointed to her right leg, and said, 'That's Christmas.' Then he pointed to her left leg and said, 'That's Easter.' Then he looked her right in the eye and said, 'Can I visit you between the holidays?" He smiled and walked away. She actually pulled over, got out of her car and started talking to him!"
"For use in a crowded dance club: 'Did you say "Excuse me" or "Squeeze me?"
"Call me milk. I'll do your body good!"
"He asked me if I had any Irish in me. When I told him no, he replied, 'Would you like some?'"
"Would you like to play fetch? I will get on all fours and you throw me your bone." |
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Getting Over Your Shyness |
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Say what you will about being able to walk over to any woman and get her number, but it's not as easy as it seems. For some, breaking the ice might be the only hard part, but for others, picking up women sounds more like a scene right out of Mission: Impossible. It's a shame that you can't play spin the bottle all your life without ever having to worry about making contact with girls and getting them under your skin. Alas, it's not that easy; you must grab your confidence by the neck, put your inhibitions in your back pocket and get ready to conquer some new feminine territories.
Are You Shy
Okay, so you might think that you're the coolest thing under the sun when you tell your friends all your chick stories. But are you really what you preach to be? It's easy to say this and that about seducing a woman, but are you that slick?
Chances are you probably bark louder than you bite. How can you know if you truly are shy -- or at least fess up that you are? There are certain indications that you might be a "shy guy", as Diana King bluntly put it in her hit song.
If you went to an all-boys school and spent years in classrooms surrounded by nothing but slow aging little boys aching to make their first contact with female flesh, then there's a good chance that you are the shy type. Put it this way: if you were never exposed to girls as a youth, you can easily develop an outer shell when it comes to grown women.
If you've never had a girlfriend (never mind just talking to a girl or standing next to a hot babe, that just doesn't cut it), you're probably the shy type, even if you think getting a girl's attention for a consecutive fifteen minutes is an exploit worth mentioning.
Signs you're a shy guy___________________
I'm a loner baby
If you prefer being by your lonesome self and taking care of your own business, then you lean towards the loner type. Although this doesn't necessarily mean you'll end up being an eternal bachelor, you very well might be on your way.
You're the effeminate type
Even if experts in the field agree that every man has a feminine side, it seems that some of us have it more than others. If you need direct proof, just look to Richard Simmons. Case closed.
This mentality or personality trait might get you initial contact with the female species, but will ultimately land you with nothing more than a couple of shopping dates.
You're way too friendly
After numerous rejections, some men either develop a no holds barred method to approaching women, or the complete opposite by becoming overly friendly. In the end, being too nice and cuddly will get you a peck on the cheek because you end up infiltrating the female circuit.
But don't be fooled; you only enter the female club as a bystander, but you don't get to really enjoy the goods. To understand it better, keep in mind that if you can't beat 'em, join 'em.
Want some tips to get over your shyness?____
get over it
If you fit the described profile of a typical shy guy, you're probably wondering what to do to get over it, right? Well, search no more. Here it is.
Force yourself to meet women
The hardest part about timidity is working up the nerve to meet a woman and maybe even get her phone number. If you were planning to stay home on a Saturday night and catch re-runs of Gilligan's Island, then think again.
Just call a buddy, head out to a night club, and put on your Don Juan persona.br
Develop an alter ego
Just like Eminem has an alter ego named Slim Shady, why not develop a side of you that accentuates your good parts? I'm not saying you should have a fake personality and trick people into believing you're something you're not, but rather improve your "superficial character".
Whatever you do, just be honest and don't fool others too much; they will only come back to haunt you.
Approach women that don't intimidate you
The best way to avoid getting nervous or anxious over something is by not really caring about the outcome. This principle applies perfectly when you approach a woman that's mildly attractive and want to strike up a conversation.
By not caring about what she's going to say, you're more likely to be nonchalant about the situation, which, in turn, piques her interest.
If you recall the movie Swingers, where a bunch of guys are out to hound women, you'll remember the classic words of Jon Favreau, "Act like you don't need the sh*t, and they give you the sh*t for free." The same applies here.
Think positive and be confident
Getting over your shyness starts from within. Cheesy, yes, but true nevertheless. If you think of yourself as an asset that women would love to have, women will see this state of mind emanating from you. If you don't think you're good enough, women will feel the same.
Maintain eye contact
The importance of eye contact is that it's an extension of a high confidence level. It all begins with eye contact and usually becomes an indication of whether a man will get shot down or not.
If she looks at you and discreetly invites you over, play the game and accept her invitation. Don't forget that you can find out a lot just by looking in a woman's eyes.
Bring a friend to the bar
Being at a bar with someone can provide enough comfort when it comes to talking to women. You know that whatever happens, you'll always have your buddy to support you. Furthermore, he can give you tips as to which woman to approach first, and how.
So next time you're out looking at a beautiful woman, but don't know exactly how to approach her, remember that the hardest part is actually going over and maintaining a stimulating conversation. Once that's done, the rest is history. And as history repeats itself, you will be well on your way to a womanizing streak. |
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Meeting Women Online |
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How often have you heard people talk about how they're tired of going to bars and picking up women? Your friends no longer want to approach women in clubs; what's the point when every one is a psycho that sticks pins and needles in voodoo dolls of all their exes?
Some might say that men are tired of the old, and are ready for some fresh new ways to meet women. Well, the Internet seems like the perfect solution for what ails them.
hi ho, online we go
Although a roundtable discussion with my fellow authors at AskMen.com gave way for a heated debate on the issue, many people have various opinions about this new dating technique.
While The Player preferred getting her phone number the traditional way, and Heidi liked it when chivalry was used to win her heart, all were open to this new concept.
not for losers__________________
Men have the misconception that online dating services are only for ugly guys that can't get dates, or for those that are afraid of rejection. But many men worldwide are opting for this new service, simply because it's at arm's length and because you don't have to put on an act to impress women online -- at least not face-to-face.
If you chat with a new prospect and realize that she is talking nonsense, you don't owe her anything, and you can simply end the conversation and move on. Try doing that on a first date; it's not quite so easy to do, unless you're the renowned bathroom window escapist.
I personally know of men -- in relationships for that matter -- that have tried these services out of curiosity, only to discover that they had a lot more in common with these online women than with their current girlfriends.
who is it for?___________________
So if losers don't make up the majority of the online Casanovas, then who does? And more importantly, what kind of women should guys expect to meet?
Here's who the guys are: professional men that don't have the time to go to clubs and deal with the old song and dance necessary to court women. The same women who would end up brushing them off once their boyfriend Bubba comes to take them home after last call anyway.
Developing an online dating identity doesn't have much to do with your people skills, rather it's more about your present life situation. If you work 55 hours a week, go to the gym, take care of your house, and walk your dog every day, then once you add up the numbers, there isn't much free time left to meet new people.
On the other hand, women who use these services often try to find their Prince Charming that will get to know them before thinking of landing them in bed. In a way, online dating offers the possibility of two people getting to know each other before thinking of the pleasures of the flesh; it cuts through the skintastic innuendos and gives way for dialogue. And that, my friends, is what decent women are in search of.
Although you might land yourself that sexy mama looking for casual sex with a face in the crowd, most of them actually search for a great guy to settle down with. Either way, you decide what you want.
So if online clicking is for you, what are all the benefits?
you're the boss___________________
Think of it; you basically have a catalogue of beautiful women that want to engage in conversation with men that share the same interests. It doesn't get much easier than that if you ask me. Compare this with having to look slick, slap on some of that Armani cologne, and have all those funny lines handy for when you first approach that sexy brunette at the other end of the bar.
You can usually go through a listing of available women online (kind of a black book that you didn't have to sweat for), and choose the one that's most to your liking. Red hair, exotic look, dark eyes, nice body, and so on.
Furthermore, you get to cut through all the first impression red tape and move straight to the questions that matter. Are you single? What do you look for in men? What kind of relationship are you looking for: friendship, casual, romantic?
These are all legitimate questions that might be forecasted as warnings on the first couple of dates, depending on how open the new woman in your life is.
it's all good: the benefits____________
Add up all the good parts of meeting women online and you'll be asking yourself why you're not doing it right now (or at least right after you finish reading this article).
The best part about it is that you get to choose from a selection of beautiful women (of course, you have to dig to find them) aching to shoot the breeze with fellow Internet love-seekers.
Here's a quick list of why you should click your way into a new relationship:
It's a lot cheaper than a date.
The woman forms an opinion of you based on your personality before judging your looks.
If she gets annoying, you can log off.
You have time to think about the right answers to her questions.
It's an easy way to meet people, especially if you're a shy guy.
No face-to-face contact. In other words, you can scratch yourself, eat pizza and watch hockey while chatting with her.
If you're not a good-looking lad, you can at least charm her with your writing skills.
You get to meet women from around the world.
You can be with several women until you find your perfect match. |
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Top 10 Things You Should Never Say To Her |
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All right gentlemen, men have always been blasted for not being very truthful. Some even say that nothing could ever justify lying. I agree that you are better off coming clean most of the time, but there are some instances when you are better off either shutting up or telling a little white lie -- or risk spending the night on the couch.
1. Man, you look so much like your mom!
Now, unless her mother is a yummy mummy and everyone knows it, you are better off not saying this to a gal. For one thing, she does not want to associate herself with her mom, and second, you are saying that she looks old. Instead, ask her whether she thinks she looks more like her mom or her dad, but even then you're opening a can of worms. Just leave this topic alone.
2. I would have invited you, but you're no fun
You're gonna die, it is that simple. Tell her what you will, lie to her if you must; this is when white lies and fibs are practically mandatory. I agree that if your lady will not have fun somewhere, like at your buddy's house to watch the game, do not force the issue by inviting her only to be polite. Instead, spin it as if you knew she was busy or would just be disinterested. It could save your life.
3. Anything related to marriage or children
While many, many women would love to meet a man mature enough to discuss life's, you know, small intricacies, some could care less. Others are out for a good time, and you talking children and kids may sound nice on Disney's after-school specials, but for the most part, it will either give women false hopes or just get you in trouble one way or another.
4. Would have, could have, should have
Feel free to engage in philosophical hogwash after drunken sessions with your friends, but when it comes to women, avoid getting all sentimental and philosophical because again, you are simply opening up avenues of torturous rhetoric. Keep it simple and shut your mouth; you will thank me later.
5. You don't need another pair of shoes
This is when Imelda Marcos bursts out of the wall and shreds your arm off. You see, it is not a rumor or stereotype that women have too many shoes. It is a reality. It is insanity and defies all logic, laws of nature or science. I have stopped questioning this. In fact, use the different shoes to your advantage to spice it up in the bedroom.
We dare you to say the number 1 thing...
6. Any story about your private life
Sure it's cool for your gal to know about your past adventures, exploits and legendary feats, but it's no good. In fact, it's very bad because she will assume that you are still up to your old tricks every time you say "goodbye, see you later." And if this is not bad enough, if you ever do slip up, then she will know ASAP.
7. Come on, a few little cramps never hurt anybody
Okay, we may all think it, but does she make fun of you when you get bruises and bumps after your games? Probably not... at least not out loud, so you should be just as courteous. Rumor has it that women like a drink or two when they have their period, so suggest a nice glass of wine to soothe the cramps.
8. What's the big deal? You have another birthday next year
Run -- that is really all the instruction you need for this one. Actually, forgetting a loved one's birthday is bad, but forgetting your girlfriend's birthday is grounds for a break up. Even Ike Turner got Tina something, no? In any case, use reminders, ask your friends, have your parents inform you... hell, get her friends to remind you. It's her birthday; she wants to feel like she is the center of your universe, where she belongs.
9. Are you sure the dress shrunk?
"How much do you weigh?" is not the only question to be avoided. One of women's greatest insecurities is cellulite, so watch out for that as well. Instead of saying, "sorry dear, your dress hasn't shrunk, you just enlarged," be positive and suggest healthy eating, working out together, and anything that will not hurt her but rather have her appreciate your caring and loving side.
10. That's not the way my ex did it
Even if your new girl is miles better than any of your exes, do not compare notes. Why? This is bound to take you down No Man's Land Avenue and lead you to the doghouse. She is smarter than that, and she will find something incriminating, like "Oh really, well how many exes did you sleep with?" Don't compare breast size, skin softness, leg factor, or the bass' rhythm, just enjoy the buffet. And if you happen to be walking down the street, keep your head straight and check your vision. |
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What She Says & What She Really Means |
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It's too bad that some people don't come with instruction manuals, since men and women can become pretty complicated. But part of the whole fun of not knowing what a woman is really saying when words come out of her mouth, is trying to figure it out along the way and learning in the process.
If you're losing sleep at night because your girlfriend told you to call her later, or because your date said she didn't want to come in for a nightcap, then you may want to get a peek into what women really intend when they say certain things.
Let me take you on a journey to the land of the female: a place where shoes are more important than DVDs, and a portable phone is better than a remote control. We'll go on first dates, tenth dates, into yearlong relationships, breakups, and all the other places that women venture with men. Don't worry -- this'll only hurt a bit.
Trying to pick her up........
"I have a boyfriend."
She means: I may or may not have a boyfriend, but you don't stand a chance.
"I don't dance."
She means: I don't dance with you, but I do dance with my female friends.
"I don't drink."
She means: I'll drink whatever a guy I like gives me.
"I don't have a phone because I just moved."
She means: I have three lines, a cell and a beeper, but you can't have the number.
"I also love Jim Carrey, what's your favorite movie?"
She means: I want to know more about you, so tell me...
When she gives you negative responses, it doesn't necessarily mean that she's not interested, it just means that she's either giving you the cold shoulder out of reflex, or she's just not interested in being picked up. Don't take negativity personally; it could just mean that she's out with her friends and wants to focus on that.
But if you do score a first date, here are some things you may hear:
First dates.............
"Let's go somewhere quiet."
She's saying: I want to get to know you better, so let's go somewhere where we can talk.
"How do I look?"
She means: Are you good with compliments?
"I don't drink."
She means: I don't want to lose my guard and do something stupid on the first date.
"What was your last girlfriend like?"
She means: How do I compare to your last girlfriend?
"What do you look for in a girl?"
She means: Do I fit the mold?
What does she mean by, "I'm at a stressful point in my life right now?"
After the date...........
"I actually have a big day tomorrow."
She means: I don't want action on the first date.
"My roommate is sleeping."
She means: You're not going to see me naked.
"I'm at a very stressful point of my life right now."
She means: I'm trying to let you off easy.
"I love movies... I love playing pool... I love seeing plays."
She means: I would love to do these things with you.
Into the relationship.........
"How do I look?"
She means: Am I as pretty as when we met?
"Isn't that girl gorgeous?"
She means: Is she prettier than me?
"How many kids do you want"... or... "Where would you honeymoon with your wife?"
She means: Do you see me in your future?
"If we went on Temptation Island, would you cheat on me?"
She means: How much do you love me and would you even go on Temptation Island?
"I'm not feeling so good."
She means: I would feel much better if you kept me company.
"I need to get a whole wardrobe."
She means: I want you to come shopping with me.
"I'm not mad."
She means: I'm pissed.
"Nothing is wrong."
She means: Nothing is right.
"My friend thought what you did was very rude."
She means: I thought what you did was very rude.
"That guy is so my type."
She means: I want you to dress like him and cut your hair like him.
Breaking up.......
"It's not you, it's me."
She means: It's you.
"I just want to be friends."
She means: We're going to talk for one week and only when we bump into each other after that.
"You mean a lot to me, I just don't think it's a good time right now."
She means: It'll be a good time when I'm with my next boyfriend.
"I have a lot going on in my life now."
She means: I want to concentrate on other things in my life, like my friends, work, and returning to the single scene.
"I'll call you soon."
She means: Don't call me, I'll call you… maybe.
Although men seem to be from Mars and women from Venus, we do both speak the same language -- it's just a little hard to understand at times. But once you get to know the person well enough, you'll be able to find out exactly what your woman really means, rather than what she says. |
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Top 10 Signs Your First Date Was A Success |
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So you are finally lucky enough to land the date of your dreams... excellent. You do everything by the book, and now you're back at home. Did she have fun? Probably. Did you make a fool of yourself? Highly likely. Will she call you back? Possibly. Will you get another chance? Sure. So stop worrying and just read the following 10 signs that your first date was a success.
1. Never-ending evening
You decide to walk her all the way home even though she lives across town. Once there, she suddenly does not need to be home. You then decide that you want to have a cup of coffee (even though you both hate caffeine). You chitchat over cake (that you do not touch) until the wee hours of the morning only to circle around town until sunrise. Too bad you've got to be at work in 1 hour.
2. When can I see you again?
She already decides on the next place she wants to go to with you and wants to plan the next date before the first one is over. A second date booking during the first one is usually a sure sign that she had too much fun for her own good.
3. Hook, line and sinker
She's already memorized your phone number, your family members' names and your favorite everything. In fact, when you meet her roommate as you walk her to her door, you overhear your date saying, "You're going to be seeing a lot of him, so remember his name." This is not so bad; just consider yourself lucky that you don't wake up and find a wedding ring on your finger.
4. Schmoopy...
You finish each other's sentences. When you toast, she utters, "To the first of many dates." To top it all off, this does not make you nauseous... (give it some time, it will). Once you get home, you decide to put your little black book to rest (temporarily, of course).
5. Don't worry, be happy
She laughs during most of the date because you're hilarious; your sense of humor and charm (not to mention rugged good looks -- yeah right) have won her over. Ask any woman what they look for in a guy, and a sense of humor usually comes out on top.
Will there be a second date?
6. Let's get physical
She lets her hair down, runs her fingers through yours, hugs you before you part ways, and even slips you the tongue.
7. She invites you over to her place
If that kiss wasn't enough, she resists letting your hand go and devilishly invites you into her apartment for a drink. Being the gentleman that you are, you want to refuse, but how could you be rude and decline?
8. You have one new message
When you get back to your place, you find a message on your answering machine from your date, saying how much she enjoyed herself and how badly she is looking forward to the next sensuous evening.
9. Envious friends
You run into some of her friends a couple of days later and while they are happy for their friend, they all smile at you and wish you were theirs. A sign that you enjoyed yourself too: you actually don't want any of her friends and only think about your date.
10. The Ultimate
I personally would say that you cook breakfast for her. The Player might add that you run out of condoms and notice wrappers all around you when you awake. Mr. Mafioso would interject that you wake up with her serving you breakfast in bed (and she didn't even sleep over). Any way you slice it, if she wakes up in your arms, chances are that you will be begging for seconds... |
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Flirting Tips for Boys |
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Do you work for UPS? Because I could swear you were checking out my package."
"The word of the day is legs, so let's go back to my place and spread the word."
"Did you wash those pants in Windex, because I sure can see myself in them."
"My friend was stopped at a stoplight during race week in Daytona Beach. A really cute guy came up to her window, pointed to her right leg, and said, 'That's Christmas.' Then he pointed to her left leg and said, 'That's Easter.' Then he looked her right in the eye and said, 'Can I visit you between the holidays?" He smiled and walked away. She actually pulled over, got out of her car and started talking to him!"
"For use in a crowded dance club: 'Did you say "Excuse me" or "Squeeze me?"
"Call me milk. I'll do your body good!"
"He asked me if I had any Irish in me. When I told him no, he replied, 'Would you like some?'"
"Would you like to play fetch? I will get on all fours and you throw me your bone." |
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